DON’T BOTHER TIDYING, THIS WEEKEND

Submitted by Editor on Sat, 25/02/2017 - 14:51

Is your life encumbered by clutter? 

Do you yearn for the wide open spaces of an IKEA showroom? A world free of unread novels and knick-knacks and hairballs the size of chihuahuas? 

But are you simultaneously incapable of throwing anything away or hoovering? 

One local resident has come up with an ingenious solution: cram everything you don’t want but can’t bear to part with into the back of a car. And the front.

This Peugeot on Bonnnington Road Lane is packed to the gunwales with bin-bags full of stuff. In fact, it’s also stuffed with pieces of itself: hubcaps, shelves, and a door for starters.

On closer examination, what we find here is a rare instance of mechanical auto-cannibalism. In due course, it will presumably turn itself inside-out, form a black hole, and drag the whole of Edinburgh into its gaping maw.

At which point … No clutter. No dust. Nobody. Sorted.