Breaking news

He cometh forth like a flower, and is cut short.

Plenty of room upstairs.

On reflection, all is not as it may seem.

Not fooling anybody.

As you read this, advance copies of the August Spurtle are already appearing across the barony. Secure yours now before Greg Proops grabs the lot.

Issue 320 comprises tightly packed local news.

It begins, like Issues 1–319, with Page 1. We cover new homes many people will struggle to afford, bad parking, repulsion (for now) of an alien invasion, and the mixed joys of camelopards. Plus balls – more of them, more often, and more visible at night.

Another day of choking clouds on Dundas St and Fettes Row. Reality was much worse than it appears in this photo.

Shady opportunities are not all they're cracked up to be.

Ill-advised abbreviation in Tesco Broughton Road.

Making moments into memories. For sale in a shop called, appropriately enough, Go Outdoors.

High plains drifter.