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MACARONI THEFT IS PAST A JOKE

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Has anyone seen ‘Rory Macaroni’? 

Christina Thomson installed him in the small mid-pavement garden at the end of Bellevue Place on Saturday evening.

By Sunday morning, his head had gone walkabout.

As the photo here reveals, the unmolested Macaroni bore an uncanny resemblance to Rory McIlroy, who is preparing to lead the European team against the US in the Ryder Cup at Gleneagles later this month. Any clues to the whereabouts of his missing bonce would be much appreciated.

Alternatively, just return it quietly under cover of darkness. 

ONE LAST ROLLER OF THE DICE?

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Work began last week and continued over the weekend to try and convert the garage on East Scotland Street Lane – which always looked like a dwelling and briefly had aspirations to be an office – back into a garage.

There was a lot of furious activity on the roof, and the glass elevation facing the tennis club has now gone, replaced by a roller shutter.

MOOMIN MARVELLOUS

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Frankly, it makes no sense. 

This phrase adorns both sides of the Rodney Street Tunnel, where it first appeared, we think, in late July. 

Spurtle has failed to establish any particular reference in the Moomin canon to sauce loving, or any contemporary usage of the term which clarifies its appearance here now.

If your superior understanding of the Moomins, Snork Maiden, Snork, Snufkin and the Muddler, or indeed your experience of making or retaining sauce, suggests a plausible explanation, we’d love to hear it.

EARTH, SEA AND SKYE

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Skye-based James Newton Adams’ paintings in his solo exhibition at the Union Gallery are mostly of people and places in the Hebrides or west coast of Scotland. 

They are rendered in a style which looks, at first glance, rough, childish and unconsidered. A second look, though, soon reveals some very subtle brushwork and a more complicated approach: a process of paring down, refining each scene until what remains is a kind of irreducible narrative essence.

LAZAROWICZ DRAFTS WAKE-UP CALL FOR DOZY PARKERS

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The Westminster Parliament will today discuss Mark Lazarowicz MP’s private member’s bill aimed at extending Holyrood’s powers to curb bad parking. 

At present there is uncertainty about whether this power has been devolved to the Scottish Parliament. 

If successful, the Edinburgh North & Leith MP’s bill would remove any uncertainty and allow Holyrood to tackle what he describes as ‘irresponsible parking which can be not just a nuisance but a real danger in the case of the elderly, children and people who may be visually impaired or disabled in some way’.

NEW CHOIR FOR KINSHIP CARERS

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A new choir is starting in Edinburgh for relatives and friends who look after children in their families where a parent is unable to do so. 

Circle – a Scottish charity which supports such ‘kinship carers’ – has won Big Lottery funding for the project, which starts on 9 September in St Andrew’s and St George’s West Church on George Street.

'JOHN BYRNE: SITTING DUCKS'

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REVIEWED BY RHYS FULLERTON 

‘I think each one of us has to get through these years of trial, without hope, and without despair.’ René Magritte in letter to John Byrne. 

In 1967, John Byrne was working in a carpet factory, unable to make a living from painting. He wrote a letter of admiration to Belgian surrealist artist René Magritte.

CACOPHONOUS CAPITAL

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David Hill – better known to some for his tweets as @NewTownFlaneur – disagrees with those who want to retain St Stephen's chimes around the clock. Here he delivers a counterblast demanding peace and quiet at night ...

CRUMBS, IT'S CLOSE

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In the run-up to this month’s Scottish Independence Referendum, startling new figures about voting intentions have emerged.

We are not talking about YouGov’s results published yesterday, but the latest not-stricty-reliable monthly poll conducted by Cuckoo’s Bakery on Dundas Street.

Based on purchases of politically themed cupcakes up to 28 August, the gap between those intending to vote Yes and No has narrowed to 1.3%.